I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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