Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Randomize
