my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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