Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
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he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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