you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Randomize