Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
where are my eyebrows?
Randomize
