i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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