i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
