Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Randomize