Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I supernannyed him into submission
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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