You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
should my penis look like a turkey
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
