Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Pants 0. Shit 1.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
