It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
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