puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Randomize