idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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