I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Terrible idea I love it
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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