New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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