No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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