he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
