Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
