i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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