My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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