I swear she didn't look like that last week.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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