Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
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