i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
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