where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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