My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
