two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
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