shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
