I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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