i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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