So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize