You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
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