i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
We had to coat check the pizza.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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