you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
