Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
You need a sexual gate keeper
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
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