Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
