please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
So squirting runs in the family.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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