I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
