okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
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Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
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When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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