Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
foreskin is a definite game changer
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
