Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...