Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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