New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
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