5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
