I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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