wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
