Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize