just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I supernannyed him into submission
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
