So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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