and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Randomize